May 8 2013

I am currently interviewing for two jobs.  I have been a temp for two years in a place, where there are now two full time positions (with benefits, sweet benefits!) open in two different departments.  Both of these departments know me.  In fact, one is for the exact job that I do now.  I feel lucky that they want to interview me.

I haven't interviewed for the second one yet, and the first one is history.  I was telling my husband about it and apparently, I have said everything wrong in that first one.  Fact is, I had a banger headache that day, and no excuses, but it was bad enough that I just didn't have patience. But the two in the interview were ladies I would joke around with anyway at work, one had a sweatshirt on, and it was a very informal interview.  They know me, and asked questions and we laughed and had a good time. God forbid I said something wrong.

Today you can go out on any number of websites that will tell you what questions they are going to ask you, and how to answer in 'your' best light.  Say this, but don't say that. Do this, but don't do that. The fact that I have been here this long, says that they know what I can do, they must be ok with that, as I am still there, and they are considering keeping me around after two years.  So interviewing is going to be a formality among friends. 

So, I wonder sometimes: is Corporate America asking about you?  Or just how you have studied for the right answers?  I have heard recently how one interviewer, after throwing a bunch of questions, in which the interviewee had answered everything as she should, threw in something she wasn't prepared for and the girl flipped out.  I'm sure she didn't actually say it, but the interviewer noticed a look of panic on her face, like, "This wasn't on the test!  Why would ask me something that wasn't on the test?"  Bless her, she almost got an A on that one.

So, I assume that with 5 interviewees, Corporate America and The Way We Do Things Here will have five very studious people saying the same 5 answers in the same robotic way.  How do you pick anyone from THAT?

Then there is me.  Which, I realize, may be the reason I am still a temp.  If they ask questions, they get my Shoot From The Hip answer.  After all, are they interested in ME, or just the cookie cutter?

And have you seen some of the questions they ask these days? The smartass in me wants to say one thing, and I know I should answer the RIGHT way, and I end up in somewhere in between.  You kinda know what the job title is, but I have been in enough jobs to know that its usually WAY more than it states. "Define this job you are interviewing for?" (My smartass would answer: Um, I don't know, don't YOU know what I should be doing?) "What would YOU bring to the job?" (Lunch, probably food for the team)   "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" (Lady, I've been a temp for so long I have to go where I can to put food on the table for my family. Any 5 year plan I have ever had, disappears when life throws me a curve and shoots me elsewhere.)

At any rate, I want to walk out of the interview so they know a little about ME.  Yep, I am a free thinker.  Yep, I have color to add to your team.  Yea, I didn't study for that test, but even back in school I didn't test well, but I can still do that job well.  I think from the other side of the brain but that side works and better, sometimes than most.  I am artistic and creative.  Nope, didn't learn THAT out of a book either, but I am me.  There isn't another like me, and I am proud not to be out of the same mold.

So take THAT, Mr and Ms Interviewer.  You are getting me as I am, and if you don't get the answers you are looking for? Then you are missing out on ME.  I hope I can be something refreshing, and different.  If its not what you are looking for, then, have fun picking from all those people that were answering the way they rehearsed.